ihavebeenfloated

You can disregard the below post where it sounds like I went through a nasty breakup. Lets just consider that to be fiction, shall we? Agree? Good.

I went and saw The Polyphonic Spree play in Hollywood last night. It was fucking awesome. The opening band, Pilotdrift, kicked a lot of ass. Jon Brion owned eight thousand times more than he did at The El Rey. Kick ass show all around.

I took pictures, of course, and they turned out pretty fucking good, too.

I went to Rubio’s a while ago to eat something. The manager said hello to me, and mentioned the weather. The cashier taking my order said, “It’s only going to get worse.”

I laughed at this comment, it sounded like something I’d say. “Please don’t say that,” I replied.

“Well,” she said. “If you read the Bible, you’d know it’ll only get worse.”

I wanted to reach across the counter and punch her right in the mouth.

1. You don’t say shit like that to customers.
1.2. Especially to customers wearing a shirt with the word HOPE written across it.
1.3. Especially when the customer is me.

2. What the fuck is up with that shit? What is it about religious zealots, people who take Christianity to the extreme, believing that every bad thing that happens is God punishing them? Why do people want to believe that?

My God is not judgemental. My God is not going to punish me for being human. My God “created” me so I can be the way I am, and does not dislike me for it. My God does not have a distaste for humanity. My God actually cares. My God is an OK kind of thing, even if it doesn’t listen to me all that much, or ever. My God doesn’t mind if I get pissed off at it, because my God knows that what it’s doing to me is going to piss me off, and expects the curses in return. My God doesn’t mind if sometimes I lose faith, because my God doesn’t need faith to be happy, because my God isn’t an egotistical bastard, even if I am. My God just wants to sit back and watch the fireworks, and maybe set a few off itself every now and then. My God doesn’t think it “created” me just to fuck with me, nor does it think that I am meant to entertain it with devotion.

My God just wants me to live my life, and let others live theirs.

Fuck all you negative Bible thumpers. (Ahem, catholics?) If you so badly want to be punished by your God, then stick your head into the oven with the gas on, (or set to 500 degrees), and hold it there. You’ll be doing the entire world a favor, because once you’re all gone, God wont have to end the world to rid it of you.

My life is a funny thing. One minute it’s falling apart, next it’s full of hope, then it’s falling apart again, and then I start to feel fine. I don’t know how I cope with it. Sometimes I feel that the changes and movements are happening so quickly that any normal person would explode at the sheer amount of drama swirling around at all times. The worry should be overwhelming, but I don’t care. Let what happens, happen. Let what ends, end. I will keep on living, even as it keeps on raining down on me.